Tuesday, December 22, 2020

Which Switch? What Switch? When Switch?

So hey, remember that image of an early Switch prototype with thumbsticks buried into the screen that got everyone worried about the finished product, but turned out to be a fake? It might not have been as "fake" as we thought, according to Twitter user Forest of Illusion. Here's an image he posted from the latest Nintendo "gigaleak," featuring... a handheld console with thumbsticks buried into the screen.

So it wasn't real, but it was an official concept, and it came much closer to becoming a reality than any of us would have liked. Look, I get enough fingerprints on my Switch Lite as it is... a system with a screen that swallows the front of the unit whole would have been a total grease magnet. What's most alarming is that this design dates back to 2014, suggesting that Nintendo had known the Wii U was a dead man walking and was eager to put it out of its misery just two years after its launch. Special thanks to Game Rant for the scoop.

"What have you been playing on the actual Switch?," you don't say, but I'm saying for you so I have an excuse to pad out this blog post. Fortunately, Nintendo has the answer to this and many other not-so-pressing questions on their year in review web site. Here's what I played the most:

I know, Highrise Heroes: Word Challenge sounds lame, and if you judged it entirely by its plot and a synthy soundtrack plucked from a 1990s drama on Lifetime, I guess it would be. However, it provided many hours of word-hunting, debris-clearing, lab chimp-rescuing entertainment. I'm a sucker for these kinds of games, as evidenced by my previous addictions to Alphabears and Bookworm. Highrise Heroes' only major problem is that it doesn't know when to make a graceful exit... ninety levels is a bit more than anyone really needs, and the bonus challenges were completely unnecessary. Thank goodness they were also completely optional.

Moving down the list, we have Smash Bros. Ultimate and Sydney Hunter and the Curse of the Mayan (Curse of the Mayan what?). I'm sure we're all familiar with Smash Bros. at this point, and this was a pretty good entry in the series, giving with one hand (Terry Bogard is a downloadable character, and that's pretty freaking awesome) and taking with the other (the new story mode feels like busywork, and has got nothin' on Subspace Emissary or Smash Run). 

Sydney Hunter was the big surprise for me, a side-scrolling action-adventure game that plays like a hybrid of retro classics from the past, without borrowing too heavily from any of them. It's a little like Montezuma's Revenge, but with more variety and a goal beyond racking up a high score. It's a bit like indie hit La Mulana, but more fun to play and not nearly as obtuse. It's got some classic Castlevania in there but there's fewer cheap deaths and more freedom in exploring the intricately crafted stages. If you enjoyed any of the previously mentioned games (and don't mind wading through an ill-considered tribute to Smurf: Rescue in Gargamel's Castle about halfway through), you ought to buy Sydney Hunter the next time it's on sale.

Next we have Far Cry: Zelda Edition- er, I mean Breath of the Wild, and Steamworld Quest: Hand of Gilgamech. Breath of the Wild didn't click with me... it's a little too vast, too open-ended, and too aimless, and the fragile weapons drove me bananas. I might go back to it if I can get a Zelda Amiibo that will keep me well stocked with swords, but even that's doubtful... I'm sure I could find better uses of my time, particularly with all the Switch games I've purchased but never touched. (Someday, Starlink, someday.)

At the end is Steamworld Quest, a fun if somewhat linear RPG that uses custom-built decks of cards in its combat system. It's hard to fault any part of this game... the attractive, painterly graphics remind me of Vanillaware's best work, the characters are charming, with the eager, lunkheaded soldier Armilly leading her eccentric friends into battle, and the card combat is entertaining, if occasionally frustrating. (One fun trick the game likes to pull on you: incapacitating one of your fighters, then continually dealing cards only he or she can play. Gee, thanks a lump.) Still, I suppose it's telling that I never finished this one, and was never inclined to return to it.

As for how much time I spent playing my Switch, here are the deets:

My use started in April when I bought the system, crested in May, and precipitously dropped by the end of the summer, likely due to my mayfly-like attention span and the Switch losing its new console smell. 

Right now I'm at just four hours for this month, which is slightly concerning. Hopefully things will pick up next year... I'd hate to think that I spent two hundred dollars on something that kept me entertained for four months.

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